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Family scapegoats with years of healing: what events or thoughts precipitated your full acceptance of your family's narcissistic dynamic? Can you share your inner thoughts as you reached it? How do we know when we have reached full acceptance?

Last Updated: 16.06.2025 02:43

Family scapegoats with years of healing: what events or thoughts precipitated your full acceptance of your family's narcissistic dynamic? Can you share your inner thoughts as you reached it? How do we know when we have reached full acceptance?

They don't love you.

You don't owe them anything.

You will never be enough no matter what you do. At best, they will make backhanded compliments or just ignore you.

How long would you let a homeless friend stay at your house?

They enjoy hurting you.

Your life is better in every single way without them.

The family's “in group” do not have intimate relationships. They are transactional and look down on each other. In other words, you aren't missing anything.

In Italy, how do people greet each other when they meet for the first time (e.g., on the street)? What's a good response to that greeting if you're not from Italy or don't speak Italian fluently yet?

The most important things to realize:

Recognizing the darkness in yourself allows you to see it very clearly in others. A narcissist is consumed with darkness. That is: deceit, sadism, and ego.

In that sense, acceptance is strongly related to building awareness.

Whenever I write a novel, I struggle with the end, should I make it open? Should the good win or the bad win? Sometime I don't even have an ending, what should I do?

You’ll know you've reached full acceptance when you receive a hoover and send it straight to spam/trash without an emotional reaction, or a second thought about it.

When you recognize your own darkness, you will see it in them, and see them for who they actually are as people. Then it will become easy to drop them from your life.